Rosalie's ideas on how to get rid of Samantha
by New Name Unimportant
Summary: No one in Renesmee's family really likes her best human friend Samantha. Especially her aunt Rosalie, so Rose decides to make a list on how to get rid of Samantha, without her niece knowing. second character Samantha. OC


**Disclaimer: I do not own twilight, but I do own the character Samantha! I created her I honor of my best friend Samantha! I would suggest reading 'Lima's vampires' my first fan fiction. It tells about Samantha. My friend Abi helped A LOT with all these plans to get rid of Samantha, she should get most of the credit! I only thought of like ten, :)**

**Ways to get rid of the demon child**

Send her on a tour of the Volturi's castle to be eaten

Send her outside during a storm with a lightening rod in her hand

Push her off a cliff

Cover her in raw meat and take her to the zoo's lion cage

Put her in a box and put concrete on it

Put prison ball thing on her feet and throw her in the ocean

Put her in prison

Stone her

Send her to Russia and let the police gun her while she is tied up

Make her battle to the death in Scotland

Send her to Spain to be a matador

Freak her out enough to get her away from us. (the Cullen's)

Send her to Antarctica to snuggle with penguins

Turn her into a Hel-Blar then stake her (It's from the Drake Chronicles. FRIGGIN GOOGLE IT!)

Send her to the hounds to learn their ways and soon become savage

Tie her to a table and spin it around and throw knives

Bury her

Burn her at the stake

Make her roll in broken glass

Put her in a box for eternity

Hang her Texas style!

Make her fight a dragon

Find Host to attack her

Make her an old lady so she can't run and will forget about us (the Cullen's)

Helena can teach her about weapons

Make get attacked by chainsaws

Throw her in Lochness.

Make Alice do her hair every day. (Samantha hates getting her hair done fancy)

Spider bite her

Throw crabs at her

Put her in a rap version of High school musical

Shave her

Rabid squirrel attack

Hype her up on energy drinks

Put her on a Japanese game show

Put her in a room full of bombs

Spray her with holy water

Make her skydive, with no parachute

Set her house on fire with her in it

Break every bone in her body

Pecked by penguins

Cut her in half

Pull out her lungs (VIKING STYLE :) )

Dunk her in lava

Make her commit a crime

Stick her in a straight jacket

Throw bricks at her

Drug overdose

Smother her

Death by elephants

Cage of lions

Make her get attacked by gang members

death by rubber ducks

drop anvils on her

throw her in a chest and ship her to Madagascar

Scare her with 'blood on the dance floor' (A band Abi loves)

Rub onions in her eyes

Hit her with guitars

Attacked by angry bears

Strap her to fire works

Jail

Slap her to death

Beat her with books

Hand her upside down

Tie her to the end of a horse and make him run

Beat her with a rolling pin

Make her eat rotten cottage cheese and duct tape her mouth

Give her a Mohawk

Cut her to pieces

Stab her with a million needles

Throw her in a really big hole

Shove her body on a chain saw and then start it

Cut off her head

Throw water melons at her

Kill her pillows!

Kill her hopes and dreams

Food poison

Make her high then push her out on a high window

Chase her with machetes

death by boredom

Electrocution

Dry ice

Eaten by wolves

Killed by Hel-Blar

eaten by giant pigs

plane crash

chased by lizards

Strangle

Giant statue fall on her

Poison dart frogs

Inject numbing medicine in her so she can't move at all

Give her rabies

Make her join a foot ball team

Stick her in a freezer

Boil her

Kill her with music

Beat her with thorns

Hit her with high heels

Tickle her to death

Make her brush her teeth with a hair brush

Push her down a water fall

Death by French people

Hit her with glass bottles

Make her get clawed

Outlaw hugging pillows or just pillows in general!

Penguins peck her to death

Bake her into fries

Make her river dance until her feet fall off

Stick her in a giant helium balloon

Put her in the old west so she will die by guns

Throw pencils at her

Make clowns attack her

Make her drink toxic stuff

Send her to the second dimension

Make the queen, (from Alice in Wonderland) torture her

Send her on a hunt to find Atlantis

Put her in a pool of toxic waste

We can hit her with cactuses

Send her to mars

Send her to another planet

Leave her in the desert

Cover her in blood and send her to Texas so the Chubacabra will eat her

Kill her boyfriend Embry. (or kidnap him)

Bury her in snow

Barbeque her (and start restaurant)

Make bamboo grow through her

Make her fall in love with a fallen angel, then he will dump her because fallen angels can't love. And she will become depressed

We can hit her with gold

Cover her in gold and sell her for a lot of money

Give her frostbite

Send her to military school

Make her live on the statue of liberty

Tell Alice that Samantha made fun of her height. Then Alice will kill her and Jasper will drink her blood since he doesn't have good self control

Tell Renesmee that Samantha killed Finn so Renesmee will tear her piece by piece, while I watch and laugh.

Tell Emmett that she broke his flat screen TV.

Have her tell Jasper that the Union won the Civil War (no one has had the guts to tell him yet)

Break one of Esme's favorite vases and blame it on Samantha

Tell Carlisle that Samantha killed Esme

Tell Edward and Bella that Samantha talked Finn and Renesmee into getting married at their young age.

Tell everyone that Samantha called Rosalie (me) ugly. So I'll have an accuse to kill her

Turn her cell phone into a bomb


End file.
